Character Study - Correen
She grew up homeless in the lower 48, traveling in a mobile home with a dad that apparently was a Nazi. Nazi is the term used, it isn't clear if he was following the Nazi ideology or just an awes whole in general. She has seven younger siblings. The mom has never been explained. Was she in the bus? Where is she? As a writer it is always easy to blame the mom, Jane Austin did it very seamlessly, but in the upbringing of 'carrying it straight' Colleen the mom is missing. Now the mom has a role to play, living with her seven children in Delta (a place for inbreeds) and teaching all her younger children how to follow the laminated path to the white trash kingdom.
So the dad gave harm, and so this is where Colleen is. Her father harmed her and now she has to live with this stamp on her forehead for the rest of her life. Low cast, but fighting upwards. Fighting really hard. All she talks about is money, well, money and the Chamber of Commerce. I colored my hair a darker shade of brown and she commented in a way that I first didn't understand. Apparently in her world coloring your hair means you have money. Everywhere around her, every person around her has money. It's like she has an eating disorder and only sees people skinnier than her in the grocery shop. She is on the verge of breaking up with her attorney boyfriend of five years. They have constant arguments about, yes - you got it; money. He doesn't provide enough. She doesn't see that getting a job would solve the riddle. But she is fighting hard for that pass to middle class America. She has these blinds on her freaking head and all she sees is that house by the river, that new suit from banana republic, and the joy of networking with people who is like her, pretending they have money and status and in actuality are living in a freaking little town filled with gold miners. I feel sorry for her, but I can't respect her. Why the sorrow you ask? Because this whole frication about money and class doesn't mean anything. It is all made up. Good taste is just the taste of people who are in power, so good taste doesn't really exist on its own. And just like that, money has no value but for the goods they can bring us. They bring us goods so that we can survive and do what we like to do and do what we don't like to do. Live. And class in America is so foolish. It’s that social game that Colleen and her comrades have chosen to play. If it gave them any happiness that would be ok. But the result of their game is that they meet lots of boring people who laugh at stupid jokes and it doesn't have any value, and its not even fun. She doesn't realize that life is about having a good time, not about what group you are being put into by foolish people who also doesn’t know that life is about having a good time. Reality is hard, but there is possibilities of creating your own life even with the hand you have been dealt. I am me. Colleen is not herself. She is so afraid of herself that she has pushed down her spirit to the soles of her feet and they aren't walking anymore. And why don't I respect her? Because she doesn't dear to face life. She doesn't dear to face reality. I am not saying she has to face my fucked up schizophrenic reality, but at least /try/ to be happy, won't you?
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dyslecticheart) wrote,
